I have a very favorite television show that I watch. It is called The Big C. It chronicles the life of a terminally ill woman with cancer. Doesn't sound like a barrel of laughs? It is....and so much more.
Laura Linney plays the protagonist who is diagnosed with terminal cancer and through the various plot lines, she tries to come to terms with her illness and her limited time. I'm glued. I get it. I wonder how the writers of the show knew that those exact things were going on at the same time in my own life?
I've learned so much about myself through watching this series, especially in perspective to how she worries about her son's life after her death. When she recieves her diagnosis, all rationality goes out the window. She is on a short time line. Everything is urgent. Although he is just a teenerager going through the usual teenager growing pains, there is no time for that. She must fix him. He must mature, be happy, be productive and completely have life figured out before she is comfortable dying. And.......it does'nt happen. And it won't happen.
Sometimes we have to accept that life does not happen according to our own agenda or timeline. We can't speed up the process of life and maturity, no matter how much it may mean to us. We just have to understand that each person grows in their own time frame and according to their own plans. Cancer can make a person selfish. I've accepted alot lately.....they will be okay....they are okay. Perhaps they never needed to be fixed in the first place.
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