It's Not About the Cookie

I decided to diet a few weeks back and made an appointment with the local Jenny Craig. Basically, the plan is that you buy all of your food and snacks from them and you drop the weight. And, the weight does come off, but the food is pricey. The consultants eagerly try to sell me additional items that will "help" me in my weight loss plan, but I repeatedly tell them no...that I am on a budget and will only be buying the food. And, in the past weeks I have been successful in losing weight.

Yesterday, after weighing in, etc., the consultant handed me the menu for the upoming week. I made a couple of changes....tuna instead of chicken,...blueberry muffin instead of banana, etc. The consultant, who was happily tapping away at the computer inputting the products I was purchasing, said, "And, what kind of cookie do you want?" I replied, "Uh, I'm really am not a big fan of cookies. I think I will skip the cookie this week." She smiled, and said, "No, you have to have a cookie Ramona. What kind of cookie shall I put down on your menu?" I again replied, "I'm really not wanting a cookie of any sort this week. I will just have an apple that day instead." She frowned and then said again, "I'm sorry, but you have to have a cookie. You will be missing valuable nutrients that day, if you skip the cookie." Then she smiled eagerly and said, "What kind of cookie may I put down on your order?"

At this point, it was not about the cookie anymore. I firmly said, "I am not going to have a cookie this week. I'll just take my chances in living without a cookie." She replied, "May I ask you why you are so opposed to our cookies?" I said, "I just don't want one. Are you suggesting that if I don't get a cookie, I will not be able to buy my week's supply of food?" She stopped for a moment, frowned and said...."No....you can still buy your food." I then said, "Okay. Great!" Without a moment's hesitation, she said, "So you want the cookie?" ..... "No. No cookie" I said.

The consultant went to the stockroom for the food and came back with my order. I looked into the bag and saw the cookie with the rest of my food. I pulled it out and asked her why it was in my order. The consultant replied, "Oh, that must have been an error. I can remove that from your order, or would you just like to go ahead and purchase it since it is already rang up?".... I said "no" to the cookie once again.

So, clearly this was never about the cookie. I felt as though I was being manipulated by sales tactics into purchasing something I didn't want, and she was intent on selling me that cookie. I don't know. Perhaps she was really wanting me to stick to the menu and not having a cookie was going to throw my entire week off the plan and her intentions were genuine. Even now, there may be a big note on my client file that says, "WARNING - DO NOT MENTION COOKIES!!!"

I have already decided that next week, I will just go ahead and take the cookie. I may even tell her that I've decided I want TWO......that'll send her into a tailspin.

It's never just about the cookie. :))

The Impasse

I watched a documentary the other night on a polarizing social issue in our country. There was a video segment of one group that was in favor of the issue meeting the opposing group in front of the city's capital. "Okay." I think. "This is good. They are coming together to try to come to an understanding, to coexist." Seconds later, the opposing side starts shouting, mostly through bullhorns at the other side. In response the other crowd shouts back. Everyone is extremely emotional and crying, and obscenities follow. No one can hear the other side, nor do they want to. They just want to be heard themselves.

And, that is human nature...when it comes down to it, we all just want to be heard. Not just the crowds on the street, but anyone whom suddenly finds themself on the opposing side, shouting, trying to be heard above the other's voices.....My guess is that no one came away from this meeting with any sort of enlightenment. In fact, it probably just produced more contempt.

I don't know what the answer is when we find ourselves on opposite sides of an impasse....Perhaps we could just put down our bullhorns and listen.

My Pet

I'm up before dawn. I couldn't sleep at all last night because my pet kept me up. I have never been a "pet person." But, as with a lot of pet owners, I didn't seek out the pet, it just kind of came into my life one day.

My pet is the proverbial elephant in the room. I acquired this elephant a few years ago. When he was left uninvited on my doorstep, he was untamed and dangerous. I was terrified that he was going to kill me in my sleep. In fact, I was warned several times that he would eventually overpower me and to be prepared for that fate. But, over the months, and then years of having this elephant by my side, he has settled down, almost tame. He has mellowed. I have mellowed. There have even been times that I have climbed upon him and he has taken me for a ride to give me a break from leading him around, from room to room.

We have an understanding, this elephant and I.

I respect him and take very good care of him, and in return he leaves me alone......for the most part. I do occasionally have to take him in for a checkup and he gets a shot. So, the following couple of days, he is uncomfortable and since our relationship has mellowed some, I usually give in and let him crawl into the bed with me for comfort. It is not easy sleeping with an elephant and that is why I am up this morning at dawn.... It was a restless night.

I Swim

I took swimming lessons as a child, along with my siblings and the neighborhood children. We attended day after day, week after week. I learned the techniques and all of the strokes. Even though I had the knowledge, I never swam. I was afraid.

As time went by, I watched my friends jumping in the pool and diving from the board. It looked like so much fun. But, there I stayed ...clinging to the side. Even as I grew older, I considered taking lessons again. Perhaps as an adult, it would make more sense to me and I could let go of the fear....but I didn't. I became content to never go into the deep.

When I had children, I was determined that they would never be afraid of the deep. I took my girls to swimming lessons early on. It was a great relief and pleasure to see them swimming and enjoying themselves. But my fear would often grip me and at times when we were together on the lake or at the ocean, I would remind them of the dangers and ask them to stay on shore or in the shallow part.

Two summers ago, when visiting my sister, I found myself at her pool....once again looking into the deep. I dove in. It wasn't graceful or without fear, but I did it.

And, now I swim. I swim in the deep and wonder why I clung to the side for so long.

My Awkward High School Reunion

From what I have observed, alot of people feel excitement with an upcoming high school reunion, to look their best, diet for months, etc. I really had no desire to even attend my reunion in Oklahoma, other than having a fun evening with my friend Shelley. High school for me, was not the magical experience that it seems to have been for alot of other people.

When it came down to a few weeks before the reunion, with alot of things piling up, I emailed Shelley, and told her I wouldn't be able to make it. "It is the first week of summer classes" I said. She wouldn't hear of it. I was coming. "Make it work. See you then."

So, grudgingly, I paid my fee and even shopped for a dress. I made the trip to Oklahoma. That evening, Shelley and her husband picked me up at my parent's home. "Okay," I said, "Even tho no one will remember us or care to speak to us, I would like to leave a good lasting impression on these strangers. So, don't let me dance." "Okay, whatever," Shelly said with a smile.

You know where this is going don't you?

I danced. And, I danced and danced. Thanks Shelley.

The Wonder Years

Growing up as the youngest of three children, some memories of my early childhood are dim, others very vivid.

When I had the mumps at a young age, I woke up to see my sister and her two friends bent over my bed staring at me. She told her friends at school how hideous I looked with mumps, and that they could come have a look at me. I am pretty sure she charged admission.

The two of us always fainted. Sitting in the church pew, or shopping at Sears - Whooshh!! - down we'd go....My parents couldn't take us anywhere without one passing out. It became so common that my brother wouldn't look twice when he saw one of us being carried down the hallway at school semi-conscious. I even once fainted while on the toilet and knocked my tooth out on the porcelain when falling to the floor. My sister, in her girl scout uniform scurried around the bathroom floor looking for my tooth while my mother, in a panic, picked me up and ran outside with me. When I came to.. I was outside with my underwear around my ankles.

Even though we may have been more dramatic, my brother also had his moments. One morning, he woke up crying and wailing loudly that he had swallowed a nickel. Mother rushed off to the kitchen. She came back with an entire loaf of "Wonderbread." She told him to eat as much bread as he could. After a while, he was sitting in his bed, wide-eyed, stuffing himself with bread, he suddenly recalled that he hadn't swallowed a nickel - he had just dreamed he was a bubble-gum machine!

These were our "wonder" years.

If I Had a Hammer...

With a few days off, I decided to change things up in my apartment. This required hanging pictures. I don't own a hammer, but I have a shoe that has a great heel on it that I use from time to time....So I went to the hardware store to buy a hammer. But, when I arrived, I was distracted by "Ready Strips" which you can hang art and mirrors with no nails..or hammers!

So, after easily displaying things on the wall. I was very proud and satisfied with my nifty little "Ready Strips"

Later, my friend Bob came over and as we were chatting in my living room, a large picture dropped from the wall onto the floor. Laughing nervously, I said "I've been redecorating." Then, about ten minutes later while still conversing, a large mirror crashes to the floor. Bob was clearly confused and a little distressed about everything crashing around us, but I dismissed it, and we went off to dinner.

Arriving back home after dinner, I walked in the living room and all the walls were bare, with pictures lying awkwardly around the floor. So...I got out my shoe.....